I AM _________________ .

I spent the entire drive home rolling it over and over in my mind. Down right angry at the way the world works. Because if I were in control I would grab the broken system by its shoulders and give it a shake. I would look it straight in the eye and demand change. Surely there’s something to be done, some fix to this mess, somebody out there who knows a better way.

I put the car in park and sit in the driveway all tied up in knots. This is a big broken mess. It leaves me feeling helpless and my heart literally aches. What to do… what to do. Is there anything I can do?

Yes Lord, I heard her mention we should pray about it. I doesn’t feel like that’s enough. 

As I open the door my eyes drift to the sacred space.

The vine (1)

Scripture words float across my mind. I am the vine. You are the branches. Abide in me. 

Oh my. How in the world did I go from teaching the young ones about God’s name I AM to this? Just thirty minutes ago I had them write I AM ___________________ and fill the blank in a way that points to God in their struggle. Some word to remind them of who God is in the midst of the hard. It’s so easy to teach, much harder to live especially when the issue is big, and there’s nothing I can do to control or change it.

I take my own medicine, heed my own teaching words and fill in the blank.

I AM working, saving, protecting.

I AM WHO I AM.

I AM the vine, you are the branch. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

Please don’t misunderstand. These are not words to be taken out of context. Nor are they coins to slide into some heavenly slot machine. No, these are reminder words. For truth is I am in control of very little, and I waste much energy attempting to fix things I’m not called to fix.

My friend was right. When the issue is too big and it feels there’s not much we can do, we pray. We write words in I Am blanks and abide. For prayer has the enormous power to change the world and its systems.

And at the same time it unfolds enough in me.

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